Wow, damn.. This place has changed!
What is up guys?! Long time no see. I see the place has gotten a little makeover since I last stepped foot in the door.
I've been setting up my life, fixing up my income and getting my life rolling. So far so good! I've got stable income, managerial position and .. well.. alot of shit to write about. I've got a good few blogs that will explain all the stuff that has happened over the past few months. Not many, but sure to get a good feel and read out of most of you.. who haven't forgotten me. :|
11/4/06 - Monday
So, life likes to give a little and take a little. I found this out personally, and in a painful fassion. There's so much that I've gained over the past year. So much to be thankful for. So many prayers answered and gifted to me. Blessings rained down as if it were early spring and I was a young flower. But as they say, when it rains - it pours.
I gained a family, then lost it. I gained a brother, then left him. I gained respect, then disrespected myself. Friends, only to leave them behind. A job, only to feel I don't belong with my promotion. And an angel, only to find out that a mortal can never make a perfect mate.
I talked before about 'Is this being grown up?' , and to my chagrin I've found the answer.
Growing up isn't about responsibility. It isn't about money. It isn't about friends, jobs, cars, or even love. It's about realizing that you can't have everything. You can't always be happy. You may get what you want, but you -will- lose something in the process. Growing up is about being thankful that you don't have less, even when you have nothing. You can not have your cake and eat it too. If you did, you'd have nothing for the other guy. What other guy, you ask? Any other guy. They have to eat too, you know. But hey, at least you had the cake. That's more than some can say. Does that make sense?
In the past two weeks I've gotten a serious wake up call. I had 'it all' - or at least enough for me not to want more. Then 'she' left me. I've been having serious medical problems, both physical and mental. I work nights, so it's hard to even go out and have a good time anymore, but I still manage to squeeze that in. I took up smoking again too - I don't think I have to explain why at this point though. And so much more that I just don't want to list.
Even though I'm going through all of this, I still find time to smile. Even though 'she' is gone, our friendship has grown ten fold. Even though I have medical problems, I have friends that help. Even though I work nights, I find a fondness in the cold moon. It's all shades of grey. Nothing to hoot and holler about, but I could very well have less. It just makes me wonder what I will lose next, and what will take it's place. It makes me feel as if the happiness factor in my life is like a little portable hard drive. It can only hold so much of the stuff you want before you have to delete one of your favorite oldies to make room for the new age technology.
But it's not all bad. I've always said change is good, and most often for the better. I know the path I run down will cause me to lose many things, as well as pick up some new wonders that make my life livable for the moment, and that is what life and growing up is all about... right?
I've been setting up my life, fixing up my income and getting my life rolling. So far so good! I've got stable income, managerial position and .. well.. alot of shit to write about. I've got a good few blogs that will explain all the stuff that has happened over the past few months. Not many, but sure to get a good feel and read out of most of you.. who haven't forgotten me. :|
11/4/06 - Monday
So, life likes to give a little and take a little. I found this out personally, and in a painful fassion. There's so much that I've gained over the past year. So much to be thankful for. So many prayers answered and gifted to me. Blessings rained down as if it were early spring and I was a young flower. But as they say, when it rains - it pours.
I gained a family, then lost it. I gained a brother, then left him. I gained respect, then disrespected myself. Friends, only to leave them behind. A job, only to feel I don't belong with my promotion. And an angel, only to find out that a mortal can never make a perfect mate.
I talked before about 'Is this being grown up?' , and to my chagrin I've found the answer.
Growing up isn't about responsibility. It isn't about money. It isn't about friends, jobs, cars, or even love. It's about realizing that you can't have everything. You can't always be happy. You may get what you want, but you -will- lose something in the process. Growing up is about being thankful that you don't have less, even when you have nothing. You can not have your cake and eat it too. If you did, you'd have nothing for the other guy. What other guy, you ask? Any other guy. They have to eat too, you know. But hey, at least you had the cake. That's more than some can say. Does that make sense?
In the past two weeks I've gotten a serious wake up call. I had 'it all' - or at least enough for me not to want more. Then 'she' left me. I've been having serious medical problems, both physical and mental. I work nights, so it's hard to even go out and have a good time anymore, but I still manage to squeeze that in. I took up smoking again too - I don't think I have to explain why at this point though. And so much more that I just don't want to list.
Even though I'm going through all of this, I still find time to smile. Even though 'she' is gone, our friendship has grown ten fold. Even though I have medical problems, I have friends that help. Even though I work nights, I find a fondness in the cold moon. It's all shades of grey. Nothing to hoot and holler about, but I could very well have less. It just makes me wonder what I will lose next, and what will take it's place. It makes me feel as if the happiness factor in my life is like a little portable hard drive. It can only hold so much of the stuff you want before you have to delete one of your favorite oldies to make room for the new age technology.
But it's not all bad. I've always said change is good, and most often for the better. I know the path I run down will cause me to lose many things, as well as pick up some new wonders that make my life livable for the moment, and that is what life and growing up is all about... right?
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Neplight on
Hey there...long time no chat ay?? I am really having a hard time in thinking of what it is that I am wanting to write to you here, but the one thing that I do know I want to say is that I am here for you. Finding a way to communicate may be hard, but I am wanting to do whatever it takes in order to be there for you if you do need someone to talk to; whether it be by e-mail, by comments...anything. I have many ways in which you can get a hold of me: Neplight05@aol.com, I have a myspace...yes I know, lol, but here is the link for that is
http://www.myspace.com/neplight, I have a xanga...http://www.xanga.com/Neplight, and I still have my cell phone (423)773-4370. Hope to hear from you. Adios for now!
*~*Heather*~*
*~*Heather*~*
